Kindergarten Blues

I've mentioned elsewhere that I'm an unbelievably indecisive person. (It really is unbelievable.) Well, now you get to witness it first hand. Last month I pleaded with the "Governmental Powers That Be" to "like, IMPLEMENT" full-day kindergarten. And now I've changed my mind.

WHICH really goes to show that it's true what they say: you really do need to let things sit for a while before you make decisions on them (like that chick-pea curry I made for my extended family the other night, which really was quite good once I let it sit for a bit, marinate...).

Now that I've let it sit for a bit, I realize that half-day Kindergarten is definitely best for my child. In fact, I'm now what they call a staunch supporter of the program because I understand a little more what kindergarten's about, and what's involved and what's at stake. It is not to be entered into casually, too soon or too fast. It is the freaking beginning of The Journey.

Sure, this journey started when the doctor announced "It's a girl." (And if this same doc hadn't told me how fat he thought I was at the end of my second pregnancy -- IT WAS ALL WATER -- that would have been a wee bit fonder memory. FYI.) But, the emotional journey? The freaking Self? Capital S? It starts now, in Kindergarten. I had no idea.

And it's making me cry a little these days. I wasn't ready for this! (Was she ready?) I'm anxious for her! (Clearly, she's anxious.) I tell the other parents "it's the wind that's making me cry" when she reluctantly ascends the stairs to her classroom. But, it's not the wind. And she hasn't been sleeping through the night....

I have the Kindergarten blues.

And so, to the proposal to make Kindergarten longer -- a full day? I say NAY. Half a day of kindergarten is plenty to ease my child gently into this new life, into freaking society (OMG). 

She needs the time. She needs to dip into it gradually. Because she wasn't prepared (neither of us were) for that senior Kindergarten boy in her humongous class to break her little heart when he told her she couldn't stand in line beside him. And she. She stares into space unable to process the rejection.

It breaks my heart thinking about what my child -- and what children in general -- go through at this early age when everything is so new, when kids can be so mean.

So, "Governmental Powers that Be"? Please keep our Kindergarten just the way it is, or at least give parents the option of sending their children half day. Because, I see now, every child and parent has different needs. I didn't know what my child's needs were when Kindergarten first started and I'm all sitting there all annoyed that I didn't have all that time I thought I would to brush my freaking hair. Call me naive (I'm a big girl, I can take it), I didn't know it'd be this huge a transition.

Half the day -- good ole 2.5 hours -- is plenty. Indeed, full day might put me into full-blown Kindergarten depression.

This is an original post for Canada Moms Blog. You can find Haley at her personal blog Cheatymonkey.com, and her tasty chick-pea curry at her Cheatykitchen.com (but maybe do add cinnamon and a half cup of raisins to spice it up a little...). Also catch her totally unmarinated and uncensored thoughts on twitter -- @cheaty.