Spell, Check

So, last night I was just about to get up off the couch and get a snack go clean my kitchen, when a new show on the CBC compelled me to stay where I was.

It was Canada’s Super Spellers, and ohmynerdygawd, I knew I had to watch.

Now, I know that watching 12 preteens in various states of camera-readiness face off against each other for spelling supremacy is not everybody’s cup of tea, but I loved it. Of course, I am a 1986 Regional Spelling Bee participant (and a huge nerd). Plus, my sleep-deprived brain is totally fuzzy with motherhood these days, so any chance I get to flex my intellectual prowess is welcome. And right now my intellectual prowess is on par with 11 year olds, who I can mostly beat. I also really like the Jeopardy Teen Tournament, but those nerds are sometimes way smarter than me, so when I know I can't answer,  I just pretend I didnt' hear the question correctly.

Anyway, in an effort to make spelling (but not children, relax; they were all glasses and cardigans) kind of sexy, the CBC designed an elaborate set, complete with a host that the mums will think is cute but has only a marginal ability to relate to people 20 years younger. But then the CBC must have known that the cute host needed some help with the kids, so they added the presence of former Street Cents host, Jonathan Torrens, as a supremely weird hologram/word maven with a receding hairline, bad timing with the unfortunately square handle of Gerund Alpha O’Megga III. The constant presence of such weirdness was making me kind of embarrassed to be so into the show, and it didn’t take me long to wonder why the CBC would condescend to these smart kids with the employ of such a weak computer-generated mascot. The kids were polite to the creepy avatar, but c’mon – these are genius, violin-playing, poetry-writing, math- award winning, smarter-than-you’ll-ever-be tykes; watching them have to talk to a stupid floating CGI head that made even stupider jokes (‘We’re going to make spellevision history!’)  was just stupid.

Anyway, back to the show. The first part of the bee was a straight-spell, with the kids cycling through a list of words that got more and more complicated until only one speller remained. I have to admit, I did not do as well as I had hoped I would. That is, I did not win. I think the word I went out on formaldehyde, and I swear I just didn’t hear the word correctly. It was a crushing blow, and it brought back all manner of uncomfortable memories of the fateful day in 1986 that my shining star went dim at the Regional Spelling Bee finals. Sigh.

Fortunately, I totally rallied during the next section of the test, The Scramble. I rocked the scramble, screeching offering my answers loud enough to wake the kids faster than any of those kids. It took me, like. .03 seconds to make REFEREE out of EFREERE, or to know that AFDOLIFD was DAFFODIL. Booyah!

Scores were tallied again at the end of the round, and I proudly noted that, not only were the pre-pubescent girls heads and shoulders (literally) taller than the prepubescent boys, but they were also occupying the top 5 spots. I was proud for the future of my species, and happy to note that not only were they smart, but the gals were rockin cute little outfits, too. Oh, c’mon – if your claim to fame is that you appeared on a nationally broadcast SPELLING BEE, it’s good to have a decent sense of style by time you hit high school.

Round three was by far my favourite portion of the show. It was the speed spell competition, and spellers had 40 seconds to spell as many words correctly as possible. It was fun. The words were not necessarily tough to spell (nation, champ, woozy), you just had to get the letters out quickly. It was more a test of general recall, like speed-reading I guess. The point is, you totally had to be a super-genius brainiac to do it. The kids did really well, and so did I. I generally missed about one word per pass, and again, it was due to a hearing problem, not a spelling problem. Chris made fun of my stumble at one point, so I challenged him to try a round, and it was a disaster. He just can’t talk that fast. Proudly, I can.

Once everybody caught their breath, Evan tallied the scores again, and unfortunately, two of the boys were eliminated from the competition. They cried! I cried too, and I don’t even remember crying when my own premature demise came at the 1986 Regional Spelling Bee.

So, we’re down to 10. Well, 11 including me, because I’m still in it too. Tonight, the competition continues, with harder words and new challenges. But I’m ready. And I’m practicing, so b-e-w-a-r-e.

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This is an original post for Canada Moms Blog. Karen also writes at The Kids Are Alright.