Under the Influence
When my daughter came home with a fat lip last week, I winced. But when I found out how she got it, I cringed.
Apparently, Mischa had walked right into a fist wielding an imaginary light saber. The fist belonged to my daughter’s three-year-old playmate; the light saber, to an imaginary Luke Skywalker battling his nemesis, an imaginary Darth Vader, in the guise of another playground friend.
I know that popping Mischa in the kisser was an accident, but both my husband and I were shocked that a three-year-old’s knowledge of Star Wars was so complete that he was even able to role-play in the first place.
Since when is Star Wars a movie for the toddler set?
My husband and I make no apologies for the fact that we seriously monitor (and limit) the shows that our kids watch on TV and take huge care in choosing movies for them to watch during our bi-monthly ‘Family Movie Night.’ While we can, we tightly control our children’s media exposure, and that means appropriate subject matter in what they are exposed to. Violence - particularly the kind where one person imparts pain and suffering on another, we feel, is simply and completely, not appropriate.
However, as Mischa spends her last months as a pre-schooler surrounded by all the neighbourhood’s children and the joy of summer’s carefree days, we are quickly realizing that our control is beginning to erode.
A few short months ago, we had to turn off The Little Mermaid 15 minutes in, as the aggressive father and sinster octo-queen, or whatever she is, scared the bejeezus out of our four-year-old. In talking it over later, my husband and I realized that our daughter had never been exposed to the formulaic, often brutal Disney model. She had never watched anything so violent. But this week at the grocery store, she picked up a roll of wrapping paper, and declared it a sword. Later, she told me to buy her a Spiderman backpack, as she wanted it instead of the cute Gap one with the innocuous owls on it that I had already got for her. I had to wonder - how the hell does she even know Spiderman, and why does she think I should just buy her something anyway?
It’s not realistic to think that upon entering kindergarten, our daughter’s ‘innocence’ will stand up to the influence of older kids or classmates with older siblings and their knowledge of all things commercial, violent and/or mainstream. I just thought that we had more time; a few more months to raise our daughter in our peaceful, gentle bubble, where four-year-olds are not consumers and toddlers do not watch Star Wars.
Perhaps by the time my younger daughter – who WILL remain a baby for at least a year more – stamped it – enters school, I’ll be desensitized to the influence of a child’s peers, and think it perfectly normal that she exhibits a knowledge of the world that her six-year-old sister has imparted.
Meanwhile, I will try to prepare a game plan to level the playing field. Their Hannah Montana vs. my Bob Marley. Their Bratz Dolls vs. my Waldorf babies. My Light Bright vs. their light sabers. Hopefully, with a little effort and a lot of interaction, I can keep them from the dark side for just a little while longer.
This is an original Canada Moms Blog post. Karen also blogs at The Kids Are Alright.
